Let’s start with this current bid of madness, about doing away with gender identification in Nebraska grade schools:
Nebraska school district has instructed its teachers to stop referring to students by “gendered expressions” such as “boys and girls,” and use “gender inclusive” ones such as “purple penguins” instead.
“Don’t use phrases such as ‘boys and girls,’ ‘you guys,’ ‘ladies and gentlemen,’ and similarly gendered expressions to get kids’ attention,” instructs a training document given to middle-school teachers at the Lincoln Public Schools.
“Create classroom names and then ask all of the ‘purple penguins’ to meet on the rug,” it advises.
A special kind of crazy, huh? Now, let’s get local. The mascot “Aztecs” is officially offensive, at least according to some, enlightened students:
Filed Oct. 2, a formal resolution from the SDSU Queer People of Color Collective asks the student body to abandon all Aztecs references and eliminate the school mascot, the Aztec Warrior, because the words and costumed cheerleading “perpetuate harmful stereotypes of Native Americans, including the notion that Native Americans are innately violent, dangerous, and ‘savage,’ which is demonstrated by the Aztec Warrior’s aggressive body language, the Aztec Warrior’s use of a spear at special events, the use of a spear on the SDSU Athletics Logo which is printed on uniforms and SDSU memorabilia, and the slogan ‘fear the spear.'”
SOLUTION? Name every team “the Purple Penguins”. It offends nobody and achieves the goal of equality. If every college and professional sports team were named “The Purple Penguins”, we will finally have achieved racial, gender, and ethnic equality.
Just don’t mess with Notre Dame. I”m completely comfortable being identified with pugnacious fenians. In fact, I adore the stereotype.